Murphy, my bitter little brother

All my life I have had bad luck. If it could go wrong it went wrong for me. Luckily for me nothing seriously wrong has happened (knocks on wood). Murphy is like that little brother who is hell-bent on destroying your life. People always stare in disbelief when I tell them the stuff that has happened to me. I’ve decided I am going to start a stand up career based off my life experiences. I’ll be sharing some of my “stories” over the next few days. Hope you find them as funny as I do.